Flat Batteries

Now, normally for these things we’d fill in this part with some sort of pre-amble bollocks that has a vague connection to what then follows. Well, sometimes at least. It’s mostly just rambling rubbish designed to pad the piece out and make us look like we’ve put some thought or genuine effort into it all. […]

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Fleeting Popularity

Popularity. It can be a fleeting experience. Or so I’m told. Being ginger and a non-league football fan, I of course wouldn’t have a fucking clue about such things but I am at least well advised by people who are experienced in such matters. It’s also a feeling our beloved U’s have come to know […]

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Delia’s Early Start

So, here we are boys & girls, another ‘exciting’ pre-season campaign comes to a close and we’re now just a mere seven days away from the start of the season itself. What’s that? “Thank fuck”? Yes, quite. There’s only so many half arsed walks in baking sunshine even the saddest and most dedicated Non-League saddo […]

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CONIFA 2018 Day 6 – From Last to First

As we got deeper and deeper into the CONIFA Rabbit hole, a certain route to the finish became clear to me. With the final scheduled for 6pm at Enfield and the 15th v 16th Place Play off at 12 down in Bedfont at the end of the Heathrow runways it meant that I could see […]

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CONIFA 2018 DAY 5 – Brucie, Billy and the Magyars

If you hadn’t already guessed, the last few days have mostly been a blur of going to football, watching football, taking pictures of football and then writing about football. And this means that the good lady has had to put up with this football bollocks a bit longer than she normally would in a regular […]

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CONFIA 2018 Day 4 – HUN-GA-RIA For Success

So, here we are then. The nitty gritty, the serious stuff, the exciting bit. The group stages are done, we’ve lost half of our 16 teams (except we haven’t really as they’re all playing Placement games until Saturday, but we’ll ignore that for now) and we’re now into the knockout stages of what’s so far […]

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CONIFA 2018 Day 3 – Tantra Techniques & Poor Panenkas

After the truncated nature of Day 2, it’s back to full steam ahead for CONIFA Day 3 here at Gandermonium HQ. We’ve got two games lined up and best of all, they’re both new grounds. Which for sad Non-League nerds like us, is frankly just about the best thing in the world. I only hope […]

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CONIFA 2018 Day 2 – Battle of the Lands

I hate adulting, it’s rubbish. Always getting in the way of the really important and cool stuff. Like pissing about following a football tournament for teams from places that officially don’t really exist. Can you outsource your adulting? Is that a thing these days? Surely in this post-Brexit, make profit from any old rubbish world, […]

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CONIFA 2018 Day 1 – Starting With Nothing

Normally, an alarm to wake me on a Thursday morning is not a fun thing. It means getting up and going to work. Which I unfortunately have to do as I want (and need) money to do stupid shit and drink beer at the weekends. Oh and pay my mortgage, yeah that too. But mostly […]

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West Sutton Welcomes the World!

If you’ve been paying attention in the last couple of months to our ramblings on here and on social media (and let’s face it, why wouldn’t you have been?) you may have noticed us mention something called ‘CONIFA’ once or twice. What do you mean ‘no’? Oh come on, you must have done?? Not even […]

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