Kinky Mascot

Following the little run of bad results lately, the lads have dug in despite numerous injuries and managed to put a bit more lead back in our collective pencil with a couple of wins this week. First we nabbed our first and long overdue away win of the season at AFC Wimbledon with a 1-0 […]

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Dubai Armchair

Amazing what a local derby can do to football teams and people connected to them, isn’t it? For Sutton, the win at Plough Lane ended a run of 5 consecutive defeats in all competitions and – for the time being, at least – consigned concerns of a ludicrous number of injuries causing a genuine relegation […]

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Orinoco Flow

It’s been a tough couple of weeks here in the Republic, as the U’s have found form, goals and fitness somewhat hard to come by lately. This has meant that our current run of form is up there with Matt Gray’s worst back in the early days of his tenure pre-Torquay and it’s such a […]

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Roundabout Route

With an injury crisis, a habit of conceding heartbreaking late goals and a run of consecutive defeats probably the last thing Sutton needed was yours truly turning up at a game. My recent attendance at matches have yielded some very sketchy results; going against the grain of the almost unparalleled success U’s have enjoyed in […]

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Back on the Bike

Remember when you were a kid learning to ride a bike and when you fell off your folks would just tell you to brush yourself down and get back on and try again? Well, I always thought that was bollocks. That shit properly hurt and I’ve grazed my knee and both my elbows. I’d like […]

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Green Around The Gills

When you follow a football club as long as us losers have, you get to learn a thing or two. Now I’m not talking about the best way to utilise a false nine, what the fuck a trequartista is or whether a 3-5-2 is better than a 5-3-2, oh no. We’re sad but we’re not […]

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Meh or Men?

Good day to you dear reader, yes, I have returned. My sabbatical from churning out this nonsense endlessly has come to a close and I return refreshed and ready to retake the reins and astound you with wondrous tales of drunkenness, stupidity and shit League Two football. You lucky lucky devils! Wait, where are you […]

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Stuffed Crust

Pizza Cup is a competition despised by most hardcore fans – yet dear to us at Sutton after our first and only participation to it led us all the way to a Wembley final. So, on a quiet Tuesday evening, a trip to Leyton for a group stage game is not the most appealing, but […]

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Birthday Boy

You know that line in the Who’s “My Generation” – I hope I die before I get old? When you slide casually into your seventh decade without much fuss you tend to think let’s not be too hasty here lads, let’s have a cup of splosh and a Rich Tea in front of the fire […]

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Grief and Sadness

Alright kids! How’s tricks? Oh wait, don’t answer that, I know full well you’ll no doubt have been parked up in front of the endless news cycle of Her Madge’s clog popping last week, clad purely in black whilst hugging a box of Kleenex and sobbing into your brew. A terribly sad event of such […]

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