As I head rapidly towards formal and legalised “concession” status, rather than just trying it on at the turnstile on a wintry awayday or at the pensioners lunch club down the Nelly, I find myself drawn increasingly to the more simple pleasures in life and the headlong dash towards what the marketing men laughingly call […]
Tag: Bornatotter
Bertie Smalls
The process by which the Gandermonium editorial board decides whose turn it is to trot this old pony out for your delectation is a well guarded state secret. Well, it was, until I decided that the time has come to lift the lid and shine a light into the more murky corners of our already […]
Spoons Carpet
“Sutton for good mutton, Cheam for juicy beef…. “Croydon for a pretty girl and Mitcham for a thief.” I love a bit of local history me and this playground rhyme is thought to date back to the 1800’s when our beloved Gander Green Lane was just that, a farm track populated mainly by geese and […]
All Mod Cons
“I know i come from Woking, and you say I’m a fraud. but my hearts in the City where it belongs…” Can’t possibly start off a blog about Woking without quoting its most famous son, yep, the Weller Fella, the old Modfather himself, a man worshipped by our own desert boot fetishist and turnstile spinner […]
Non-League Stinks of Piss…
Orient. Now then, here’s a thing. One of the worst Saturday afternoons of my life was spent on a trip out to the old Brisbane Road sometime around 1980 to see them play Brentford. “What the fuck were you doing heading all the way to Leyton to watch some poxy lower-league fixture with Brentford for?”, […]
Normal For Norfolk
I’ve no idea what’s supposed to be so funny about Norwich but it seems to generate all kinds of unexplained hilarity in certain comedy quarters. If they want to pedestrianise their City Centre that’s their fucking business and it happens to be one of those rare subjects on which I have no opinion to offer […]
Dagenham Royal Swagger
Dagenham. Away. Easter bank holiday Monday. A clear sign that the long season is starting to wind its way to a conclusion. With this being my final report for Gandermonium before the summer break I decided to have a bit of a run up to it and posted up a daily Dagenham-related song on the […]
Woodbines & Offal
It would be fair to say that my old man never really understood vegetarianism. He was an advocate of the old-school principle that everything from an animal’s arsehole to its snout was all fit for the pot. There used to be a stall in the long-lost , and long-lamented, Sutton Indoor Market where you could […]
Indecent Proposal?
This is something a little unusual for us. An attempt at being serious. It’s not a practice we’re particularly big on if we’re honest. However, sometimes you just have to take a deep breath and be adult for a change I suppose. So here goes… On the 10th February 2017, Liverpool FC took the decision […]
What’s the Story, Tobermory?
Never been a fan of the Wombles, and truth be told never likely to be. Snouty-nosed fuckers scabbing off the jobs of street cleaners and bin-men. Getting themselves all busy in shit that doesn’t concern them. You can keep em mate. So, let me cast my mind back one last time to Plough Lane in […]