The Duke of York

The time was around two o’clock, or was it one o’clock? Maybe it was two o’clock/one o’clock? Something like that. Anyway doesn’t matter what time it was. All that mattered was what was happening right in front of me, The Firm Leader was engaging in doing his interpretation of 1996’s Los Del Rio’s Macerena with […]

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A Pub Crawl with Betty Ford

There was a quiet murmur in the room, the smell of anticipation was everywhere. Some of the lads were up at the front, their expectation like that of school kids waiting for the tuck shop to open. Others that were more experienced in these situations had more of a look of mild disappointment that comes […]

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The Fotze, The Fica & The Fitta

The second midweek away trip of the season is now upon us as we have a little cruise to Kent to contend with. This obviously means that it’s a quick in and out job like you get with the neighbour’s wife. And as most people know, we’ve to make this trip without the recently departed […]

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Denys, Denise, Der Knees

Jesus, how long has it been since we’ve seen Sutton win away? A quick look back at the records show that it was in fact bloody Lincoln back in the middle of August. And that was also the last time we managed to stick the ball back into the back of the net away from […]

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Failed in Wales

The screaming sound of the alarm goes off, it reads 0530. I slowly rise up and look around aimlessly, and for a split second I think I’m late for yet another working day. For the third consecutive Saturday we are due to play away again. After the drubbing at Chester and the total fuck up […]

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Blog On The Tyne

If you’ve been hanging around these here parts for any length of time, you may be aware that we here at Gandermonium have a motto of sorts. “Leave no man behind! (Unless mutually inconvenient to the rest of the group)”. And we meant it too. Well, until Saturday night at least. On several occasions in […]

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Back to Reality

Is it true that we have attained our highest ever league position recently? “Yes luv, we’re the 95th best team in England”. Is it true that despite them being ex-league clubs, we’ve been on the receiving end of some of the most sourest of grapes? Shit Ground, Shit team, Shit food, blah blah blah… Is […]

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The Limpin’ Imps

Our first Saturday away trip has finally arrived. And for the second time this week we get to visit a new ground. If Forest Green was one experience, then a little excursion to the northern lands that are Lincolnshire was going to be something different all together. But one thing that was definitely going to […]

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Doing the Zaza

So here we are at the end of another Pre-Season campaign of sorts. And before your eyes are firmly fixed upon Saturday’s match against the team that comprises the former Solihull Borough & Moor Green, we have one final game to play. Of course, with four days to go till the opening match, you would […]

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