Manly Handshake

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 206 BILLERICAY TOWN – 0 SUTTON UNITED – 1    [Fowler 12] With the side performing slightly less spectacularly than a troupe of ill-trained gibbons recently, tonights trip to bottom club Billericay isn’t exactly our idea of fun. A win is desperately needed, not only to reverse our awful recent record, […]

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Canary Caning

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 499 SUTTON UNITED – 0 HITCHIN TOWN – 3   [Dillon 19. Parker 35. Williams 89] Wank, shit, pony, crap, bollocks, arse, cack, rubbish, toilet, piss-poor, shambles, joke, disgrace, kharzi, pants, shite, nonsense, toss, mickey mouse. I couldn’t quite decide which term to use to describe today’s debacle against Hitchin, so […]

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Bump Of The Midgets

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 411 SUTTON UNITED – 1    [Watson 58] BRAINTREE TOWN – 2   [Mooney 36. Forrester 75] Despite saturdays defeat, fortunately the results around us went our way and we only dropped 1 spot to 15th. Otherwise we’d really have been in the shit. Not only in respect to making that […]

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‘Orrible Urchins

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 502 HORNCHURCH – 3    [Stirling 8. Graham 76. Johns 81] SUTTON UNITED – 0 Please note, due to the rather awful nature of this defeat, the ‘match’ part of this report will be somewhat brief. But, fear not, all the rest of the usual bollocks is all here. Tuesdays exit […]

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Defenders Required. Apply Within!

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 221 MAIDENHEAD UNITED – 2    [Boyce 14. Gray 16] SUTTON UNITED – 0 Saturdays encounter with title favourites Canvey is swiftly followed by a Tuesday night trip to not-so-title favourites Maidenhead and the continued hunt for vital points towards that 60-odd point mark that should secure a spot in the […]

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Unsurprising Result

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 600 SUTTON UNITED – 0 CANVEY ISLAND – 1   [Duffy 26] After picking up 3 vital points at Harrow during the week, the U’s faced another tough encounter, this time with title favourites Canvey making the trip down from Essex. As if their expensively assembled side wasn’t enough to deal […]

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The Hills Are Alive…

HARROW BOROUGH – 2  [OG 27. McKenna 58]  SUTTON UNITED – 4  [Watson 9.40. Gray 68. Bolt 78p] RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION | Att: 110 Thank god for foreign holidays. Whilst I was away relaxing in Austria last week, the lads had 2 games which presented a decent opportunity with picking up at least 4 points & getting […]

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Roy Essen-D’OH!

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 503 SUTTON UNITED – 2     [Bolt 10p.83p] BISHOPS STORTFORD – 2    [Barnett 87. Essandoh 90] Match Reporter: Nick The Greek With the usual group looking depleted, no Taz (something about culture and Salt mine, more like young lady and knickers), and no Chalmers (last seen heading off to […]

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Think I Preferred Purfleet…

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 431 SUTTON UNITED – 0 THURROCK – 3    [Akurang 4. Linger 36. Lee 38] Match Reporter: Gareth With everyone’s favourite webmaster (Yeah right! – Taz) away shagging in Austria for the week, I’m afraid I was volunteered to do this report and it certainly wasn’t  quite as good a match […]

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Patience Of A Saint Required…

RYMAN PREMIER DIVISION Att: 341 ST ALBANS CITY – 2    [Wraight 9. Tomlinson 47] SUTTON UNITED – 0 An early visit to St Albans is always welcome amongst the beerhounds. Mainly due to the large number of pubs. But certainly not because it’s a happy hunting ground for the U’s when it comes to […]

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